HIM!!! Once Again & Again~

February come to an end.
Still our tangled relationship keep in existence.
One and a half years we have gone through.
We ain't couple.
We ain't friend.
Or we consider as enemy?
No, I don't hate him at all actually.
Just, I'm so sick of the harsh way he used to treat me sometimes.
Just, I'm so sick of his disgusting attitude when he talk to me sometimes.
Same question without any proper answer from him in my mind.
I've had it with everything what he was done.
His appearance messed up my regular life.
It's made me freaking annoyed with my current life.
F.U.C.K. O.F.F.
For me, it's sucks like shit totally!!!
Had dream about him once again when I took my so-called nap just now.
What a sweet dream I had.
But, as a matter of fact, everything is proving me that IT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!
This won't be happened to me.
N-E-V-E-R E-V-E-R
My consciousness is telling me very distinctly.
He isn't the Mr. Right who I want.
He isn't the Mr. Perfect who I wish.
Apparently, he is out of my list if do based on the requirement of my ideal guy.
Well, it doesn't mean that I look down on him.
Somehow I just got no idea that what's the point I used to be fascinated about him.
Now, not.
Ridiculous, right?
The way we communicate with each other is different obviously.
Sometimes I text him aimlessly.
That's enough for me when I got his reply though it may just a simple and sounds like anger of 'what' from him.
I don't fucking care.
I just only want to make sure that he's with me no matter whatever he is doing at that moment.
It's insane, I know it.
Anyway, I have to harden my heart once day.
I should be.
Perhaps I really make it.
I don't wish to have this fucking entanglement with him.
Stop myself not to put any expectation from him.
I know that the consequence I get is NOTHING.
Thus, there's no reason for me to hold on this unworthy relationship.
I got no much time to waste, especially my vigor.
Okay, I know I'm barely 20.
But it doesn't mean that I can waste the rest of my precious time to do this nonsense.
What for torturing own self in this nuts way?
I'm giving it up.
Since it has utterly worn me out.
Possibly, I'm not loving him.
Maybe I'm just want to occupy him to be mine for everything.
Yeah, I'm such selfish and brutal.
No worry, my dearies.
I'm really fine here.
I won't get hurt by any frustration easily as I know to defend myself as well.
Thanks for concerning me in any way.
Appreciate loads~

ridiculous SMS

* His "Sweet Talk" *

Dear???

Sure I "believe" him???

Sorry lo..We never have proper talk with each other..





* Our Violent Fight *

Sent by me..ROFL~

Received from him..LMAO~

Depression

Look at the clock.
The time's getting on -- 4 AM.
I'm still sitting in front of my lappie here.
I just can't get myself into sleep right now.
Look for his incoming text.
Handphone never ring after his last reply at 9.32 PM.
Text him few times afterward.
Get none of response from him.
Disappointed~
I'm not get used to stay myself in this silent night.
It just make me feel uncomfortable.
Yet, had fitful sleep recently.
Keep dreaming about him.
Everything of mine are surrounded by him.
Nothing can be apart.
Their love story ended up at last.
Our story still keep on going.
Although how much shits we have gone through.
Frankly, I don't wish to have argument/fight with him.
All I want is P E A C E.

:: I Hate You still I Love You ::

...

FAILURE!!!

I Just Hate Myself For Being Such Emo!!!
Sorry & Goodbye

Liar, Am I?

I used to bluff with him.
Pissed him off always.
Just to prevent myself to not get hurt by him badly once again.
None of truth between me & him.
In his perception, I would a limmer.
Whatever he think of me.
It doesn't my matter.
As what I know, I'm still me.
I'd never change myself.
I do know myself very well.
Your judgments mean nothing for me.

I'm Shopaholic!!!

Headed to Times Square to meet up with my little boyboy Nick & Dennis who came from Ipoh on last Monday. Ooh yeah, not forget about another boy, Ju Siang who came along with both of them. I even skipped my lecture just because of them. Well, I never deny that I'm naughty student & I think I will get warning letter from my lecturer soon as I skipped her lecture few times already without giving her any reason. blerk~ Ignore this first. Later just only simply create a story to cover it. Perhaps it works. wakaka~ Okay, back to origin. I just only had window shopping with 3 little boys. Felt a bit weird when walking with them actually. Maybe because of this consider as the even first time I accompany guy to shop but not for myself. =.=ll Since Nick's cousin sister gonna come to pick them to other place, so I shifted to Midvalley for shopping afterward.

Need to adorn this luxuriant mask for my incoming faculty's dinner which themed as "Mysterious Night". Gonna get my gown & stilettos to set it off as soon as possible.

You never expect that I was trying this outfit without wearing bra at the fitting room of FOS. Can you see it clearly? Hey, it doesn't a good habit to keep staring at that "spot" huh! Slap you if you do really think to indecent side! I mean it seriously! I didn't bought this dress at last even though I like it freaking much. Sigh. =( Promised will get it when I do shop for next time. Wait me ya babe~

Anyway, still I bought 3 tops for myself. I barely spent RM49 on these. Cheap what. hohohoo~

My red shorts which cost RM30. Hot, right? hahahaa~

From top of left side : Green Teaser, The Alien, Chococinno
From top of right side : Say Cheese, 101 Dalmation, Mango Tango

My favourite doughnut, BIG APPLE DONUTS n COFFEE. ^^ I will never miss to buy doughnuts whenever I shop at Midvalley or any franchiser. I may get fatter & fatter if I keep eating this irresistable desserts.

Another snack I would buy, Tempura from Shihlin Taiwan Street Snacks at The Gardens. HoChiak!!! =p

DAMN!!! I was splurging over my budget in this 2 months. I have to restrain myself to not be infatuated with those luxuries easily. So, don't ask me go for shopping recently. If not, I'm going to chop down my itchy hands. You should know that I can't resist the temptation of shopping. I do enjoy my shopping though my high heel shoes would kill my feet badly. huhuhuu~

终极完美分析之摩羯篇

年轻的魔羯都是很单纯的，他们也不会知道自己将从天使变成恶魔。魔羯座的人天生善良，感情也都很脆弱，也许会因为一些很小的事情难过很长时间，所以他们通常在表面表现的酷酷的与事隔离的样子。其实他们只是不希望让别人看到他脆弱的一面。坚强、理智、承受是魔羯的代名词。他们并不是很随便的表达自己所想，他们希望了解身边所有人的性格，并不是因为好奇，好象只是因为一种安全感，为了保护自己魔羯生出了一种特殊能力。
　　
魔羯相对任何星座来比能在最短时间看出一个人的性格。无论他们再如何隐藏，这点很像天蝎但是他们却看不出对方的心。他们很容易就会了解到他们身边每一个人的优缺点，但是他们通常不会说出来，也不会太介意，所有的魔羯都很包容对方。请记得，如果有一只魔羯指出你的缺点那一定是友善的，虽然他们会用一种讽刺的口气来指出。
　　
所有魔羯都拥有２个性格。只是大部分魔羯都不愿意去接受，因为他们希望自己永远的傻傻的活下去，魔羯的坏可以媲美过所有星座。也许他们不相信，但是随着时间的积累魔羯的人在慢慢变坏，其实这也是一种自我保护。他们需要知道了解自己最后的一张王牌，做不做就看对方是否达到让魔羯抱负的地步了。这并不是在表扬，似乎用阴险可以形容，当魔羯讨厌一个人的时候那就是一种绝对，魔羯不会随便讨厌一个人，但是如果哪个人做的太过分，这个人会从魔羯心底彻底抹杀。如果这个人激怒了魔羯，呵呵，那么这个人就只能等着灾难的降临。
　　
魔羯是个比较城府的人，他们不会表面去得罪人，但是他们会计划着让这个人知道他所做的事情将会给自己带来多大的回报，魔羯的报复手段极其残忍，他会加倍的还给你，（如果你有一天遭受到摸名的灾难，那么你去想想你在什么时候得罪了魔羯。）魔羯并不会随便的去加害一个人，因为魔羯也讨厌自己的坏，他们是天才的杀手，一切的一切从很早以前就做好计划，而且这些计划在没有事件出现前他们就在考虑如何完美并无破绽的进行报复计划，也许这些和他的悲观有些联系，魔羯的人很了解世界，但他们固执的相信美好尽管自己知道那是不可能的，大部分魔羯都讨厌坏坏的自己，当然想抛弃自己是不可能的。
　　
朋友（最喜欢装傻的星座）
魔羯的人都很没有安全感，他们喜欢在任何人面前装傻，这可不是一般的装傻能力，魔羯人聪明就在于这点，他们认为只有傻子才会不牵扯到任何伤害，与其做一个聪明的人不如当一个傻子平凡而又随意。如果不是值得魔羯相信的朋友，魔羯永远不会让对方知道自己会有智慧。而无论安全与不安全，魔羯对朋友都很真。他们很珍惜些朋友。他们最希望获得朋友的信任，如果从一个朋友那里得不到信任，他不会再与这个朋友交往下去。和魔羯接触过的人都会认为他们脾气很好，好的似乎发傻，其实他们并不是脾气好，只是他们很会装，因为他们了解身边的朋友的所有性格，所以他们在包容对方，就算你做了什么过分的事，他们也早就想考虑好如果对方为什么会这样做，最明显一点，你们可以去看看身边魔羯的朋友，无论你怎么做那些魔羯都不会很惊讶的，其实他们已经知道你为什么会这样了．魔羯的交友观也很随便，他们可能会和贵族很好，也可能会和乞丐聊天，一切的一切只是心灵的交往，很少有魔羯会有势力眼，除非你这个人品太差了。
　　
感情（超级白痴）
魔羯的人傻的可以，他们并不了解爱情，但是他们只知道爱的感觉。对于他们任何感情的表达都是一种感觉，他们很认真的感受每一个感觉。大部分感觉都可以一个人去感觉，最失败的爱却要两个人。傻傻的魔羯一开始会认为，爱你是我自己的事情和你没关系，可是到后来越来越感觉不是滋味，于是开始对对方表白，表白成功后却不知道如何走下一步。也许是太不浪漫在作祟，魔羯的人可能会拿任何事情开玩笑，但是在爱情方面只要他说出”我爱你”或者话题谈到将来结婚，那么他绝对不是在开玩笑，魔羯很物质，但是这点和金牛处女不一样，他们的物质表现在爱上，他们认为给所爱的人带来无限的物质的就是最大的幸福，因为他们很自卑，唯一能用自己努力获得来的就只有物质了。当自己努力的去让自己所爱的人幸福的时候，自己所爱的人却因为其他的其他离开了他，而到最后自己却不明白自己到底做错了什么，真是可怜的家伙们．
　　
追求 : 魔羯的追求是认真的，只要对方不让魔羯认为完全没有机会，魔羯就会像疯子一样的追求着。他们其实对自己非常没有信心，唯一的动力只是相信自己在爱着，为了对的起自己的感情，为了认真的去爱一回。
　　
被追求 : 魔羯对于不喜欢的人不会给予任何机会，魔羯的人很善良，而且他们知道长痛不如短痛的道理。如果魔羯勉强接受了你，那也是出于一种同情心，但是交往没几天他们就开始内疚，他们认为怜悯的爱对追求者来说是一种伤害。他们会尽量的躲避并且对追求者很冷淡追求者尽量的让追求者开始讨厌她／他。如果追求者不理解的话，放心最长不超过一年，魔羯会很理智的告诉你别在联系了，她／他会消失的无影无纵。
　　
拒绝 : 如果魔羯真的爱了就不会去拒绝你，永远不会。
　　
被拒绝 : 魔羯比任何一个星座对感情都很认真，恢复伤痕的时间也很长，他们会选择消失。这样对你对他都有好处，因为他怕多看你一眼而又再次无法自拔、心如刀割 。

哇塞!!!
真的是讲得有够准的咯…
Even make me speechless pulak..
=.=ll

Collection>>Enamels

* Yellow+Lime Green+Grape Wine+Twilight Zone *
RM5 per each..
Just bought at Times Square yesterday..

* Top Coat+Blue Peppermint+Cute Orange+Black Drop *
RM14.90 per each..
The most expensive compared with others..

* Satin White+Balsam+Light Pink+Lavender+Midnight Turquoise+Sexy Brown *
RM5 per each..
Bought at PWTC during cosmetic fair..

Silky Girl : Snow White+Silver Stardust+Jet Black
RM8.90 per each..
The first enamels I use..
==============================
Eleanor : Unable to find out the color's specific name
Price >> RM6++ if I'm not mistaken..

My whole collection.. XD

Of course not just only that..
I still got the rest at my hometown..
But I gave to my sister..
So, the total I had spent on these are RM150++..
Argh!!!
All because of my itchy hand's fault!!!
Gosh!!!
My dad will be going to kill me once day soon..
lolx~~

Lonely Valentine's Day

Whee Whee~~
I'm Miss Lonely..
Hohohoo..
Lonely Valentine's Day I have???
Nononoo..
Definitely WRONG!!!
I'm going to be someone's spotlight..
* Glory In Myself *
I sound like hyper excited..
Terlampau!!!
Yaya..
I know I'm not ought to interrupt their dating..
But then..
Blerk~~
Don't care much..
See ya dude at Midvalley..
Wakaka..
XD

Jerk!!!

< Useless Jerk With Useless Cock! Asshole! You're Not Great Enough For Me! Train Yourself To Be More Expert! If Not, Just Fuck Off! >

According to the statement above, this is what the recent post of my MSN personal message.
Yeah, I know I sound like a crude slut.
So what?
Just fuck off from here if you dislike.
I never care with any misapprehension & also the way you guys interpret about this sentence.
Here is my territory & this is the way I give vent to my outburst anger.
Cool what, ain't it?
No doubt, everyone was asking me that who the jerk I meant.
My answer : A BASTARD!!!
Nononoo..
I think I may correct it from using BASTARD this word to describe that jerk.
THE EVEN CHEAPEST SWINE COMPARED WITH GIGOLO!!!
Is it sounds better?
Suits you, Mr. Yew?
Yes!!!
I'm doing all this intentionally.
I wanna let everybody do misunderstand you.
I wanna let everybody know how much of my hatred for you.
Let everyone look through how sucks of you.
Sad to say that I even sympathize with your gal.
She was still ignorant & kept in the dark.
She never know that you've been betray her from the very beginning till even now.
Pity her as having you this fella with a formidable appearance to be her boy.
Shame on what you did behind her back.
Fuck-less!!!
Are you arising your indignation right now?
Well done!!!
This is what the main purpose I post up this blog with loads of slutish words here.
I know you used to drop by my bloggie.
I'm going to piss you off.
Never think to ride roughshod over me.
I'm no longer a weaker originally.
If dare to affront to me once again, I won't be so easy on you.
I won't live in dread under you anymore.
I would return tit for tat.
I will just treat you as what you used to malign me viciously.


Conclusion 1 : There's nothing can talk as proper between you & me.
Conclusion 2 : You mean nothing for me start from this moment.

Tagged!!!

Okay, I know I've been abandoned my bloggie about few weeks here. Well, got nothing to let me post up here. My happening during Chinese New Year? No. I don't think I got anything to share it through here. Apologize. Anyway, still I gonna update my bloggie. If not, my bloggie seems like desolated with no one would drop by probably. Thus, thanks to my little lovable gal, Vivian Tham Xin Yun. Because I've been tagged by her since last few days ago. So that now just only I got the "motivator" to push me to refresh my bloggie. lol~~

A gal such emo. Yet, I like her!!!

:: DIRECTION ::

Once you've been tagged, you have to write a post with sixteen random things, habits or goals about you. At last, choose five people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them.


01. I'm crazy about red.
Yeah. I love red crazily. That's why I dye my hair in red color. Frankly, I don't even notice that since when I got red mania. Probably get influenced by my daddy because he bought me everything in red color. Another reason is red show me my passionate side. Red consider as the sexiest color. Hot, spicy & wild enough. True. I'm trying to transform myself to be sexy naughty bitchy. >< I will just feel more excited if you buy me red series of lingerie. ^^

02. I love my family.
I love my dad. I love my mum. I love my siblings. No reason that I state my family as the even first place in my heart. They are such important for me. No matter what, nothing can instead of it.

03. I love my besties & buddies.
Friendship means everything for me. That's why I do appreciate every single friendship I own.

04. Push myself to put more effort on study.
My result from bad to worse semester by semester. I hate to study. But due to defend my parents' reputation, I have to force myself to be hard put to it. Wishfully

05. Control myself to not spend lavishly.
I just can't resist the temptation of shopping. Guess what? I almost exhaust my PTPTN loan. Gosh!!! How I gonna survive for the next few months until this final semester? Aiks~ I know I'm such a spendthrift. Is there got any part time job can intro to me? I'm facing financial problem seriously. Or else I have to ask for extra allowance from my dad. Sorry. =(

06. Clubbing night???
[Alcohol+Music+Dance = Enjoyable] It's make me high enough when the alcohol melt away inside my body within the insane dance & the extreme music. One thing I should mention here, Clubbing Gal Ain't Bad Gal!!!

07. Proud that I own smooth & fair skin.
Everyone do envy with my skin. XD Try hard to maintain my skin well especially my chubby face. That's why I never put any puff cake or pressed powder to make up my face. It's unnecessarily for me although there's got little flaws on my face.

08. Proud that I can have great & big boobs.
First of all, I gonna say thanks to my mum for giving me such great of boobs. He even adore my breasts insanely. Haha!!! Hey!!! It doesn't mean anything with my nice boobs. So, SICKOs just FUCK OFF!!! Never try to be up to my plumpy boobs!!!

09. Begin my diet plan.
Yes! I'm fatty! Don't doubt it! This is the fact! I'm so freaking annoyed with the fatness seriously. I gonna reduced my weight become 50 kg if possible. Just give me 1 year of time to make it. Perhaps everything is shaping up very well without a hitch. Hey! Dude! Don't forget my red bikini as what you promised me before ya! Haha!

10. I wish to have a slight wavy long hair.
Want to gain my femininity & maturity. So then start to keep my hair longer than now though I'm not keen to take care of my hair with doing any fussy treatments.

11. Cant live without handphone.
I would die if you are asking me to dump my handphone aside even though just only for few hours. No call, no SMS. It will just make me feel like losting something to entertain myself. My world could become grey. I may be such emo certainly.

12. Sleeping???
Undeniable, sleeping take up my majority part of daily life. I won't mind if you really do call me as pig. =p

13. Addict to McDonald.
Got no idea that why I used to dislike McD & I never know that since when I addict to it meanwhile started "boycott" KFC. =.=ll

14. Won't be involving in any relationship currently.
So far, I do enjoy with my single life. Much freedom I have.

15. Forever love???
No. There's no FOREVER in my own dictionary. I never ever trust that so. I Love You Forever??? Hello!!! I'm no longer little innocent gal. If you thought u say out this word on me & will make me sweet enough, I can just tell you that sorry & it's better Fuck Off.

16. I hate him but still I like him.
Meaningless point. I hate him till even want to retaliate on him because of he never appreciate with what I did for him but used to stab me horribly. Perhaps everything between me & him end up soon even though I'm not really willing to mean it. Sigh.

:: I TAG ::

Kha Xiong - She is my dear. =p

Lay Peng - Push her to update her bloggie more & more. ><

Lee Peng - She has a sweet look. =)

Su Ying - I adore with her dimples. XD

仲信 - I don't know his name in malay. =.=ll