Voices from My Heart

I'm studying!!!
Please don't bother me!!!



Huh?
Is that something wrong with me?
I'm studying???
Sounds impossible, right?
Hahahaa..
Seriously..
I'm looking at my handouts..
I'm reading it..
I'm trying to read it hard..
Without memorizing..
I'm just staring at sheets blankly here..
Daydreaming around here..
Thinking some nonsenses..
Facing in front of my lappie..
Surfing internet..
Blogging..
Chatting with my MSN pal..
Watching drama..
Damned!!!
It's freaking awful on what I'm doing now..

Be honest..
I don't even like to study..
I ain't a genius in study..
All of my results were sucks totally..
I never achieve my results with prefect score..
But getting worse & worse..
I'm wondering..
What is my goal for doing my tertiary education here?
I don't even know..
Attending for lectures aimlessly everyday..
Not doing my assignments as well..
I'm just studying blindly here..
By a stroke of fortune..
I got the chance to study at matriculation..
Because of this great chance I had..
Only I can further my study at university continuously..
Behold how lucky am I..
Should be envy me, right?
But I never treasure those lucks which given by God..
I'm ruining my bright future all the way..
I know this aroused you guys indignation..

Due to my bad behavior..
I made my dearest friends felt disappointed..
Jia Qian, Kha Xiong, Yea Qin & so on..
They are so nice to guide me in any way..
They are trying to push me for studying..
I'm feel very glad to own them as my besties..
Yet I'm sorry with what they had done for me..
Gals..
Believe me..
I will change my those wicked attitude once day..
Promise I will make it..
I need your supports..
I appreciate our unobtainable friendship preciously..
I mean it..
I really do..

For my beloved parents..
The one who I respect the most..
The one who I adore the most..
The one who I love the most..
The one who care me lots..
The one who put loads of expectations on me..
I felt embarrassed with them..
I failed to live up to their expectations on me..
It's meaningless no matter how million time I apologize..
As their daughter..
I never do any duty as what a daughter supposed be..
I'm just making loads of trouble for them..
What a useless gal they had have?
I'm not appropriate for being their daughter..
I wish can be the one who get compliments from everyone..
I want everyone be jealous with you..
I want you be proud of me..
This is the only way I requite you..
To let me have a sheltered upbringing from you..
Say thanks to my lovable daddy & mummy..
For not giving me up all the way..
But still being aside with me always..

(*v*) I LOVE YOU (*v*)